WTF of the day.....

[LuthierJustin]

Woman watched NASCAR on TV with deceased friend for 18 months

That's a long race

[Kudzu Guillotine]

Woman accused of trading baby for pickup truck

[Tequila Cowboy]

Woman accused of trading baby for pickup truck

Yep, there's a DBT song in there somewhere. I really like the part about the meth. Charming.

[Beebs]

Woman accused of trading baby for pickup truck

Yep, there's a DBT song in there somewhere. I really like the part about the meth. Charming.

I read things like this for the reader comments. I don't know why. It just makes me sad/er. Anyway...

Reader comment #1 says its because we should have to take IQ tests before reproducing and reader #2 somehow blames it on government handouts and the welfare state. We've become one trick pony.

[Kudzu Guillotine]

Hard to believe this headline is from the Los Angeles Times and not the Onion.

Breaking news: Mermaids are not real, U.S. government declares


Hannah the Mermaid in the Mermaid Lagoon exhibit at Sydney Aquarium. The United States
government has declared they do not exist.
(Torsten Blackwood / AFP/Getty Images / December 19, 2008)

[Tequila Cowboy]

Hard to believe this headline is from the Los Angeles Times and not the Onion.

Breaking news: Mermaids are not real, U.S. government declares


Hannah the Mermaid in the Mermaid Lagoon exhibit at Sydney Aquarium. The United States
government has declared they do not exist.
(Torsten Blackwood / AFP/Getty Images / December 19, 2008)

First the CDC makes a statement refuting the zombie apocalypse and now this? Wow, just wow.

[one belt loop]

Woman accused of trading baby for pickup truck

Yep, there's a DBT song in there somewhere. I really like the part about the meth. Charming.

It's an Elvis Costello song, TC. I'm surprised you missed it.

He said he heard about a couple living in the USA
He said they traded in their baby for a Chevrolet
Let's talk about the future now, we've put the past away....

[Tequila Cowboy]

Woman accused of trading baby for pickup truck

Yep, there's a DBT song in there somewhere. I really like the part about the meth. Charming.

It's an Elvis Costello song, TC. I'm surprised you missed it.

He said he heard about a couple living in the USA
He said they traded in their baby for a Chevrolet
Let's talk about the future now, we've put the past away....

Indeed OBL, indeed. Nice one.

[lotusamerica]

I hope someone will tell me that, no, this doesn't really belong in this thread...

I'm at the gym and just caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror, wearing a DBT t-shirt, listening to DBT on my iPhone, reading the DBT forum page on 3DD.

[beantownbubba]

I hope someone will tell me that, no, this doesn't really belong in this thread...

I'm at the gym and just caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror, wearing a DBT t-shirt, listening to DBT on my iPhone, reading the DBT forum page on 3DD.

I think there's a Day in the Life thread around here somewhere Well, except for the part about the gym.

[Duke Silver]

A young Ron Fucking Swanson (probably NSFW):

[Duke Silver]

(shows self out)

[beantownbubba]

Eat shit and die, William May of Toledo, Ohio.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/fat ... 32697.html

[Tequila Cowboy]

Eat shit and die, William May of Toledo, Ohio.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/fat ... 32697.html

Disgusting.

[beantownbubba]

While looking for contact info to let Mr. May know how i feel about his dastardly behavior, I saw that this thread is on the first page of results if u google "william may toledo OH". Go figure.

[The Black Canary]

why????

[Beebs]

why????

cause pray the gay away doesn't always work. duh?

[Kudzu Guillotine]

On similar notes, though not nearly as extreme:

Chick-fil-A's gay marriage stance causing a social storm (CNN)

Boy Scouts Of America Reaffirm Gay Ban (The Huffington Post)

[beantownbubba]

[quote="Kudzu Guillotine"]On similar notes, though not nearly as extreme:

Chick-fil-A's gay marriage stance causing a social storm (CNN)

I guess the guy doesn't know that "the Biblical family" includes multiple wives. It is truly amazing what people can convince themselves of if they want to badly enough. As always I am puzzled by the motivation on this particular issue. What the heck is so threatening?

[Kudzu Guillotine]

On similar notes, though not nearly as extreme:

Chick-fil-A's gay marriage stance causing a social storm (CNN)

I guess the guy doesn't know that "the Biblical family" includes multiple wives. It is truly amazing what people can convince themselves of if they want to badly enough. As always I am puzzled by the motivation on this particular issue. What the heck is so threatening?

I recently got into this very same discussion with a couple of my old college buddies on FB that are of the Bible-thumping, fire and brimstone variety. Apparently it has to do with how those sort of folks interpret the Bible. No real revelation there but I still can't wrap my brain around it.

[Beebs]

They can believe and state that they believe whatever they want as long as they don't discriminate in employment or customers they serve. It just helps us know who the idiots are more easily and then not patronize them.

I think the whole "Eat More Kale" debacle is far more scandalous than just being your average bible thumping jackoff.

[Kudzu Guillotine]

Teen High On LSD Starts Fight With A Mailbox

[GuitarManUpstairs]

I usually skip reading these sorts of things as I get disgusted with humanity but I did read this one. Luckily this guy was caught before he ever actually did any of this, so far as anyone knows. This is ultra creepy..puppeteer. Christ on a cross there are some sick fuckers out there. What do you do with a guy like this? What does he get in terms of jail time for the crime he was arrested for? A few years maybe? Then what?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/24/ronald-brown-puppeteer-rape-kill-eat-children_n_1698949.html?ref=topbar

Brown -- whose Puppets Plus website promises "grins and giggles" for kids -- was reportedly caught in online chat rooms with people the feds were investigating as part of a child pornography ring in Massachusetts. He allegedly fantasized about strangling, dismembering and eating his victims.

[Kudzu Guillotine]

Did Chick Fil-A Pretend To Be A Teenage Girl On Facebook? (Gizmodo)

[beantownbubba]

Did Chick Fil-A Pretend To Be A Teenage Girl On Facebook? (Gizmodo)

Just when you think you've seen it all. I mean, really, what were they thinking? Is it possible that nobody stood up in that meeting and said "you guys are fucking crazy?". I'm guessing that this PR firm is trotting out the old "any publicity is good publicity" line in a desperate attempt to get paid for this fiasco.

[LuthierJustin]

[Beebs]

Did Chick Fil-A Pretend To Be A Teenage Girl On Facebook? (Gizmodo)

Just when you think you've seen it all. I mean, really, what were they thinking? Is it possible that nobody stood up in that meeting and said "you guys are fucking crazy?". I'm guessing that this PR firm is trotting out the old "any publicity is good publicity" line in a desperate attempt to get paid for this fiasco.

This is awesome. Viva la interwebs.

[GuitarManUpstairs]

Fei Lin's Penis Stolen By Thieves

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/24/fei-lin-penis_n_1699017.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

"They put something over my head and pulled down my trousers and then they ran off," Lin said. "I was so shocked I didn't feel a thing - then I saw I was bleeding and my penis was gone."

[one belt loop]

Here is a delightful story!

http://maureenjohnsonbooks.tumblr.com/post/20840059683/the-adventure-of-the-random-house

THE ADVENTURE OF THE RANDOM HOUSE

By popular demand* I bring you the Random House/FedEx story. This happened not *too* long ago. This is partially by memory, but I did write it down afterwards, because it was so great.

MAUREEN wanders into the local FedEx with a package she needs to send to Random House publishers. Random House is not far. She could take it there herself, but the last time she tried to surprise-take a package to a publisher she got pulled aside by security** and now she FedExes everything, even to people standing next to her.

After filling in the forms and putting the object into a FedEx envelope, MAUREEN walks to counter and presents the object for processing.

FEDEX GUY spins package around, examines label, frowns.

FEDEX GUY: I can’t send this.

MAUREEN stares, waiting for further explanation. When none is forthcoming, she spins the package back around and looks at the label, because apparently she is going to have to figure out what it is that she didn’t put on it. Because it’s not just a delivery service-it’s a TEST OF WITS. Finding no blank spaces, she feels like a bit of a FedEx failure.

MAUREEN: Why?

FEDEX: (very disapproving look) I can’t send this to a random house.

MAUREEN: What?

FEDEX: I can’t send this to a random house. You need an address.

Now MAUREEN gets it. She can barely believe this wonderful thing is happening, but she gets it.

MAUREEN: Oh! No, no. It’s a publisher.

FEDEX: Yeah, but I can’t send it.

MAUREEN: Why?

FEDEX: I can’t send to a random house.

MAUREEN: No, I mean, it’s a business. It has an address.

MAUREEN points to the address on the label, under Random House, person to be delivered to, number, street, city, and zip code.

FEDEX: (in a “you need to listen to me now” tone) I can’t send to a random house.

MAUREEN: No, it’s called Random House. But it’s a publisher. A business. That’s its name.

FEDEX: I can’t …

MAUREEN taps furiously on address.

FEDEX GUY examines package for a minute.

FEDEX: You can’t send stuff like this.

MAUREEN: THAT’S ITS NAME. It is CALLED Random House, but it is not a random house. It is a business at that address.

FEDEX: But you can’t have random house in the “send to” line.

MAUREEN: I HAVE TO. THAT’S WHERE IT IS GOING.

FEDEX GUY knows that he has said “you can’t send to a random house” about six times now and knows repeating it will not help. Looks at Maureen like she is very, very stupid.

MAUREEN: Listen, it is a publishing business. A well-known one. It is CALLED Random House. That is the actual, legal name of the business. Trust me. It will be fine. Your delivery people who get this, they’ll know what it is. I promise you. It’s not going to get lost.

FEDEX GUY is not persuaded, but shakes his head in a very New York City-style “okay, I will do this thing, because I have to do things for idiots every day of my life” way. He angrily scans the barcode.

FEDEX: I shouldn’t be sending this.

MAUREEN: Thank you.

FEDEX: That’s a stupid name.

MAUREEN: I’ll tell them.

Random House, consider yourself notified.

* ???????

** This is true. It was the release of my first book. I tried to bring my editor a present and they came close to pinning me down on the floor and turning the hose on me … okay, they boxed me into a corner and asked me a lot of questions and wouldn’t let me leave. I was just trying to bring her a gift certificate. Anyway, I still shake when I think about it.

[Zip City]

http://firstread.nbcnews.com/_news/2012 ... r-911?lite

Pennsylvania Rep. Mike Kelly on a new mandate that insurers offer coverage for contraception:

"I know in your mind you can think of times when America was attacked. One is December 7th, that's Pearl Harbor day. The other is September 11th, and that's the day of the terrorist attack," Kelly said at a press conference on Capitol Hill. "I want you to remember August the 1st, 2012, the attack on our religious freedom. That is a day that will live in infamy, along with those other dates."