Only in Philadelphia

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

tonight is the triumphant return of



Chardee MacDennis, bitches!!!

Finally!!!!

felt like it was forever, I even missed these fools

[Swamp]

I just spit sweet tea all over my keyboard

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

http://gawker.com/councilman-wants-to-m ... 1755496983

A new bill proposed by Philadelphia Councilman Mark Squilla would compel music venues in the city to provide lists of full names and addresses of their upcoming performers to local police upon request. Finally, Philly may be rid of the filthy rock and roll and hip-hop scourges forever! You’re The Man, Squilla.*

The bill, noted on the local news site Billy Penn, requires bars and nightclubs with live shows and occupancies of greater than 50 people to maintain a registry containing “the full name, address and phone number of all performance acts scheduled to perform on the premises of the special assembly occupancy at any time.” The bill would also make police responsible for approving and denying the licenses needed to hold live performances, instead of the Department of Licenses and Inspections, which currently issues them. The approval process would involve “crime, traffic, litter, noise, parking and hours of operation,” according to the legislation.

[phungi]

Perhaps a few days old, but it appears we have a mad shitter:

Man Leaves “Unwanted Present” Inside Bryn Mawr Library Stairwell

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Perhaps a few days old, but it appears we have a mad shitter:

Man Leaves “Unwanted Present” Inside Bryn Mawr Library Stairwell

perfect segue to this, even though it's not Philadelphia-related

http://deadspin.com/and-now-your-absolu ... 1755409188

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

http://deadspin.com/brawl-breaks-out-at ... 1757351306

The Wing Bowl, Philadelphia’s annual chicken wing eating contest which you should probably avoid at all costs, happened today at Wells Fargo Center. (Molly Schuyler won by eating 429 wings.) There was also a fight in the stands, presumably over something very important.

[John A Arkansawyer]

The Enduring Mystery Of 'Jawn', Philadelphia's All-Purpose Noun
According to experts, it's unlike any word, in any language.

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

The Enduring Mystery Of 'Jawn', Philadelphia's All-Purpose Noun
According to experts, it's unlike any word, in any language.

damn, never learned anything that fun in the linguistics courses I had.

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Why Philadelphia is America's Greatest (and Worst) City

he had me at house-pissers

[Clams]

Why Philadelphia is America's Greatest (and Worst) City

he had me at house-pissers

Thanks for posting that, great article. That guy gets it.

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Why Philadelphia is America's Greatest (and Worst) City

he had me at house-pissers

Thanks for posting that, great article. That guy gets it.

he should write an update after last night's Flyers games. After reading it all I could think about is that classic Bill Burr rant

[Clams]

Why Philadelphia is America's Greatest (and Worst) City

he had me at house-pissers

Thanks for posting that, great article. That guy gets it.

he should write an update after last night's Flyers games. After reading it all I could think about is that classic Bill Burr rant

Uh yeah. That was really bad.

[John A Arkansawyer]

This would be a lot funnier if it weren't true. As it is, it's really not funny at all:

Man shot dead while talking to political candidate in Cedarbrook; gang rivalry investigated

Philadelphia police are investigating whether a rivalry between two gangs led to a pair of deadly shootings in the city's Cedarbrook section, one of which happened as the victim was talking to a candidate for the Pennsylvania legislature.

[phungi]

This would be a lot funnier if it weren't true. As it is, it's really not funny at all:

Man shot dead while talking to political candidate in Cedarbrook; gang rivalry investigated

Meanwhile, only a few miles away:

Pennsylvania church shooting leaves one dead

[John A Arkansawyer]

Collingswood police questioned schoolkids about brownies, name-calling, a zombie drawing

At Zane North Elementary School, police on June 6 questioned a student who had made a gun noise and held his wooden ukulele "like a gun" during music class. The student told police he "was only kidding." Other cases at Zane involved the kindergarten fight, in which a student said a classmate had hit him, and two students trading insults like "fat" and "short" in the cafeteria...

At Collingswood High School, police responded for one student bumping into another, a phone theft from a gym locker, a student threatening to beat up a classmate, and an allegation of two students engaging in a sexual act, which turned out to be unfounded, according to the reports.

I'm glad we got that cleared up.

[Clams]

Collingswood police questioned schoolkids about brownies, name-calling, a zombie drawing

At Zane North Elementary School, police on June 6 questioned a student who had made a gun noise and held his wooden ukulele "like a gun" during music class. The student told police he "was only kidding." Other cases at Zane involved the kindergarten fight, in which a student said a classmate had hit him, and two students trading insults like "fat" and "short" in the cafeteria...

At Collingswood High School, police responded for one student bumping into another, a phone theft from a gym locker, a student threatening to beat up a classmate, and an allegation of two students engaging in a sexual act, which turned out to be unfounded, according to the reports.

I'm glad we got that cleared up.

Don't be bringing New jersey shit into this thread. (We've already got a WTF thread which should cover Jersey just fine).

[John A Arkansawyer]

Collingswood police questioned schoolkids about brownies, name-calling, a zombie drawing

At Zane North Elementary School, police on June 6 questioned a student who had made a gun noise and held his wooden ukulele "like a gun" during music class. The student told police he "was only kidding." Other cases at Zane involved the kindergarten fight, in which a student said a classmate had hit him, and two students trading insults like "fat" and "short" in the cafeteria...

At Collingswood High School, police responded for one student bumping into another, a phone theft from a gym locker, a student threatening to beat up a classmate, and an allegation of two students engaging in a sexual act, which turned out to be unfounded, according to the reports.

I'm glad we got that cleared up.

Don't be bringing New jersey shit into this thread. (We've already got a WTF thread which should cover Jersey just fine).

Whoops! My mistake. I saw it was from Philly.com and assumed it was another case of Brotherly Love Upside Your Head.

[phungi]

I shit you not:

Meet the Philly genius who turned a dumpster into a pool

[Tequila Cowboy]

I shit you not:

Meet the Philly genius who turned a dumpster into a pool

Now THAT"S making America great.

[beantownbubba]

I shit you not:

Meet the Philly genius who turned a dumpster into a pool

Good old fashioned American ingenuity of the kind you just don't hear much about anymore.

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

I shit you not:

Meet the Philly genius who turned a dumpster into a pool

stunned that Charlie Kelly King of the Rats is not involved

[John A Arkansawyer]

We will get back to the news in a minute. But first, a public service announcement from the Philadelphia mayor's office regarding dumpster pools.



I've had that song on my mind for a while now. You know the one. It goes like this:

We don't fit in with that swimming pool crowd
We're a little too rowdy, a little too loud
So there's no place that I'd rather be than right here
With my red flesh, white boils, and blue-ribbon beer

In view of the City's commitment to public health, safety and basic common sense, we will not issue permits for block party dumpster pools. And while you would think this decision would not require an explanation, three days of press requests have proven otherwise. So, Philly, here's why you shouldn't swim in a receptacle most often used for waste:

Feel free to make some up.

[phungi]

Sadly, Philly continues to be the Pace Car for Common Nonsense...

Woman Caught on Video Texting While Driving With Feet

Wednesday, August 10, 2016 11:19PM
CENTER CITY (WPVI) -- A woman was caught on video not only texting while driving, but steering the wheel with her feet on the Schuylkill Expressway.

In a cell phone video sent exclusively to Action News, the female driver can be seen with her eyes glued on the phone with both hands typing...

[John A Arkansawyer]

Sadly, Philly continues to be the Pace Car for Common Nonsense...

Woman Caught on Video Texting While Driving With Feet

Wednesday, August 10, 2016 11:19PM
CENTER CITY (WPVI) -- A woman was caught on video not only texting while driving, but steering the wheel with her feet on the Schuylkill Expressway.

In a cell phone video sent exclusively to Action News, the female driver can be seen with her eyes glued on the phone with both hands typing...

I hope that cell phone videographer didn't cause a wreck. I mean, the woman is good enough to drive with her feet! Do we know the same about cell phone guy?

[211poundsofpork]

...has always been a pet peeve of mine. I've been in a few car accidents caused by people doing their facebook/phone thing. I've also been cut off a zillion times by people playing with their phones. It's just how it is. I just don't think it is worth it. Leave the phone at home.

[Markalanbishop]

Guess the old "I blame Clams" defense didn't work this time.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/17/us/pe ... v=top-news

[Clams]

Guess the old "I blame Clams" defense didn't work this time.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/17/us/pe ... v=top-news

That's PA news, not Phila.

[Markalanbishop]

Guess the old "I blame Clams" defense didn't work this time.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/17/us/pe ... v=top-news

That's PA news, not Phila.

Don't try to lawyer us with semantics

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Philly Sports Radio World Rocked By True Story Of Fake Caller "Dwayne From Swedesboro"

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Guess the old "I blame Clams" defense didn't work this time.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/17/us/pe ... v=top-news

That's PA news, not Phila.

Don't try to lawyer us with semantics

Wait a minute.... are you anti-semantic?