New Parent woes

[mhc]

Ava Grace has been home since Friday, and it is the greatest thing in the world. However my sleeping habits have changed drastically. Goddamn, I haven't had this less amount since my nose candy days in my 20's. It is so worth it though.

[Beebs]

Mine is 13 weeks old today and I'm sure I haven't slept more than 4 hours at a single time since we went to the hospital. The first couple of weeks are pretty brutal but it gets better fast. Congratulations to you guys. Just be careful driving or around sharp objects until you get some sleep. Also, people who don't know you just had a baby and are badly sleep deprived may think you are very, very stoned.

['Scratch]

I'm tempted to say it'll get better. And it will. But you will still need to dig deep and recalibrate your coping abilities to deal with everything from diapers to birthday parties. It's all good though. Especially once you grasp the concept that your needs are now much less relevant. Kind of like a messy crash course in Zen, but with diaper bags, bibs, strollers, crying and the realization that kids are so fucking awesome you have a whole new outlook on life. For men, this takes a couple years. Or at least until the kid starts to worship you.

For example, I never knew how cool stinkbugs were until I had kids.

[Smitty]

Cooley will be a year old this month, and I don't think I've ever slept as much as I have this past year
A few nights when he was sick went by sleepless, but otherwise we've had a very laidback baby that loves his sleep.
He comes by it honest

Sorry ya'll!

[tinnitus photography]

i know this won't help at all, but our youngest didn't sleep through the night until he was close to 3 years old...

[Clams]

When it's your first kid, you're just totally out of whack for the first couple of weeks. It's just completely crazy and there's no way to make it easier - you just have give it a month or two until you and the kid get into a groove. But eventually you will get used to it (and it gets easier with each successive kid). If I can recall, sleeping through the night (meaning approx 11:30pm-5:30am) started at about 3 or 4 months with my kids. One thing that might help is some room darkening shades or blinds.

[whatwouldcooleydo?]

Especially once you grasp the concept that your needs are now much less relevant.

My needs becoming less relevant? That's enough to make this man not wanna be nobody's daddy


Seriously, congrats on the new little ones, where would we be without them.

[Jonicont]

Wait until they're 21, home from college and not getting up 'til 3 in the afternoon, bitching about 'All the noise" in this house

[Beebs]

Just dealt with a chin to to ankles assplotion. I swear he saves it up on purpose.

[beantownbubba]

"Where would be w/out them?" is not a place worth going

2 to 3 yrs for men? Everybody's different of course, but for me it was instantaneous. One second i was not a father, i was full of doubts, dread, second thoughts, worry, you name it. The next second, I was a dad w/ my baby boy in my arms and it couldn't have been any better, and that's never changed. Well I take that back: I could have done w/out the hysterical call from my wife in the hospital at 2 am on the very first night, telling me that she just woke up to find out that our new baby had been taken to the NICU (neo natal intensive care unit). But even those few difficult, desperate days (when nobody knew what was wrong w/ him and his life hung in the balance and we weren't even allowed to touch him) now count among those wonderful days of being a dad.

I quickly learned that nobody tells you how hard it's gonna be, probably because you'd never do it if you knew, but also because it really doesn't matter. You'll never be compensated, you'll never be appreciated, you'll never be acknowledged, at least not to any degree commensurate w/ the time, effort and aggravation, but nothing will ever make you happier or give you more satisfaction. So "enjoy" those sleepless nights knowing that it's just one measure of how happy and how lucky you are

PS to Beebs: He does

[beantownbubba]

Wait until they're 21, home from college and not getting up 'til 3 in the afternoon, bitching about 'All the noise" in this house

Advice, really more of an observation, from a much older friend w/ kids in college when mine were under 5: "Little kids, little problems; big kids, big problems."

[littlemamma]

As a new mom I was so possessive, I really felt like a mama bear.
I remember eating steak with my hands on the couch and nursing and just thinking it was the
absolute highlight of my life.
I yell at other kids if they mess with my girls and give their moms dirty looks.
When they get sick you try to catch their puke with your hands and you let them hand you their boogers.
My baby girl was in one of those sling thingies non stop for 9 months and slept in our bed.
I am now permanently sleep deprived and I don't care, it's 5:30 in the morning and I'm staring at them both,
yes, they still sleep with me,
and I cannot wait for them to wake up.

[Gator McKlusky]

Wait until they're 21, home from college and not getting up 'til 3 in the afternoon, bitching about 'All the noise" in this house

I remember those days well--my dad bitching at me to get up that is!

[Jeremy]

Wait until they're 21, home from college and not getting up 'til 3 in the afternoon, bitching about 'All the noise" in this house

I remember those days well--my dad bitching at me to get up that is!

Amen, my room when i was home from college was in the basement and had no windows, was pitch black and always cool. And not to mention I would stumble in at 4 am, I could easily sleep until 4-5 the next afternoon. The only thing that sucked was the light switch was at the top of the stairs, and my dad wouldnt even yell or bitch, just turn on the light and that meant get my ass out of bed.

[The Black Canary]

I am finding this thread ironic. Ironic in the sense that men are the ones with parent woes, kind of funny!!!

[beantownbubba]

As a new mom I was so possessive, I really felt like a mama bear.
I remember eating steak with my hands on the couch and nursing and just thinking it was the
absolute highlight of my life.
I yell at other kids if they mess with my girls and give their moms dirty looks.
When they get sick you try to catch their puke with your hands and you let them hand you their boogers.
My baby girl was in one of those sling thingies non stop for 9 months and slept in our bed.
I am now permanently sleep deprived and I don't care, it's 5:30 in the morning and I'm staring at them both,
yes, they still sleep with me,
and I cannot wait for them to wake up.

Our summary of that is, "your gross out factor goes up exponentially the minute u become a parent." For reasons both medical and psychological (we assume), our oldest threw up at least once, usually more, EVERY SINGLE DAY of his life until he was 3+. You either get used to it or get gone, i guess.

[joelle]

when your teenage daughter loses her retainer...

[AprilTwister]

when your teenage daughter loses her retainer...

oh that brought back memories.. my son "lost" his twice. Once somewhere between home and Michigan International Speedway.. neither him or his father could recall which fast food stop ( racing was on the mind ). And once in the movie theatre.. he took it out to eat popcorn and later left with his friends never giving it another thought. I refused to pay for another replacement and after calling the theatre to learn they had "cleaned" up for the night, I drove him back and watched him go through the garbage bags the part timers so graciously put in the hallway for us.

he found it on the 4th bag and that was the last time he *lost* it...

[joelle]

when your teenage daughter loses her retainer...

oh that brought back memories.. my son "lost" his twice. Once somewhere between home and Michigan International Speedway.. neither him or his father could recall which fast food stop ( racing was on the mind ). And once in the movie theatre.. he took it out to eat popcorn and later left with his friends never giving it another thought. I refused to pay for another replacement and after calling the theatre to learn they had "cleaned" up for the night, I drove him back and watched him go through the garbage bags the part timers so graciously put in the hallway for us.

he found it on the 4th bag and that was the last time he *lost* it...

that is awesome!
i can't really be too pissed at her though,
she is pretty spectacular.
and i had to do the retainer garbage hunt once when i was in high school ( luckily, second can in the lunchroom)
hopefully, she did not put it in the wash, like my son did with his cell phone...

[never going back]

I was a zombie for the first few months, pure survival mode. People ask me and Josh all the time if we're having more kids and we laugh. Why go back to the infant insanity? We have a boy and a girl, they sleep through the night (99% of the time), can go downstairs and turn on the TV by themselves on Saturday mornings and can pour their own bowl of cereal.

I'm so glad to have my life back.

[RevMatt]

Mine are 15 and 13 now. You get through the stages and make the adjustments. My oldest slept through the night at about ten weeks, once we started giving him rice cereal. My thirteen year old? I don't think he's slept through the night yet.

[Penny Lane]

As a new mom I was so possessive, I really felt like a mama bear.
I remember eating steak with my hands on the couch and nursing and just thinking it was the
absolute highlight of my life.
I yell at other kids if they mess with my girls and give their moms dirty looks.
When they get sick you try to catch their puke with your hands and you let them hand you their boogers.
My baby girl was in one of those sling thingies non stop for 9 months and slept in our bed.
I am now permanently sleep deprived and I don't care, it's 5:30 in the morning and I'm staring at them both,
yes, they still sleep with me,
and I cannot wait for them to wake up.

now THAT's awesome.